This is going to be one of those random-y, not so organized, not so planned-out blog posts that I tend to do from time to time (or, well, yeah, fairly often, ha ha). I just wanted to disclose that right off the bat. I used to excel in English class, so I know this isn't the right way to write. DOESN'T MATTER, LOL!
I have been pretty down on myself lately (read: most of my life) for not being neat enough, organized enough, efficient enough, too late, too messy, too careless, etc, etc, etc. God has given me a new attitude. I am His creation, and He made me the way He intended me to be. This is NOT an excuse to continue on in my slothfulness! It simply means that these are the sins I must personally deal with on a daily basis. Everyone is prone to some kind of sin. My biggies are laziness, gluttony and self-loathing. This doesn't make me worse than anyone else. It doesn't make me better than anyone else (such as a thief, murderer, what-have-you). It makes me human. A sinner. A wretch, like the song talks about. I am that wretch, but hey, so are you. I'm sorry if you didn't want to hear that, but it's true. The good news, there is HOPE. Some of you reading this probably already know this, but just in case some of you don't, or in case you need a reminder:
"God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son (Jesus) that whoever believeth in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life."
(That's from the JSPMV, the Jolene S.' Poor Memory Version) My point is this: trust in God with your whole being, know that He is the only one who can save you from Hell. 'Cause like it or not that's where we all deserve to go after our bodies die. But God. But God loves us so much he doesn't want us to go there. He wants us to be with Him for ALL ETERNITY. That's right, even though I'm rotten He doesn't want to be separated from me. It doesn't matter what you've done, what you're doing, or what you will do, HE will ALWAYS love you. Believe in Him. Trust in Him. Pray, "Jesus, I want to be your child. I want to overcome these sins that have been overcoming me. I don't want to live without you anymore. Fill my heart and wash me clean, Lord, I pray." There's more to it than praying a prayer. You have to mean it with your whole heart, soul, and mind. Then you have to live it out. No, God doesn't expect us to be perfect from that moment on. He does want us to strive toward the goal of perfection in Heaven. We should be forever growing from that moment on. Sometimes we will grow very slowly, sometimes our growth will be like that of a child who is going through clothing and shoe sizes, seemingly monthly. But God doesn't want us to stagnate. He wants us to study Him, know Him, love Him more and more.
And me (or you), that wretch from the song, well; that song is Amazing Grace after all. His grace has (or will if you believe) saved us, made us pure and holy. And why? For His glory, for His pleasure, because His love is perfect.
So anyway, all of this (which is VERY important) to say that God has given me a new attitude toward myself this week. Yes, I'm going to fall on my face, that doesn't make me worthless. (I am worthless on my own, but He has given me worth.) If I pick myself up, dust myself off, and carry on trusting Him, I will grow. Praise God for new attitudes!
This is the new shoes portion of the post. ;) Yesterday afternoon, the hubs and I went on a mini date. The sad news, our town is losing it's Sears store. The good news, deep discounts a-comin'. We each got a new pair of tennies for using ONLY on the treadmill (oops, they are on my feet right now; I did just run on the treadmill before I started this post. Okay, they're off now, good thing this isn't like smell-evision, lol) Now, you want to hear the absolutely knock me on the floor part of this? My new "treadmill" shoes are only a size 9.5W (and yes, they are ladies' shoes) Why is this such a flooring thing? Because my Skechers Shape-Ups are size 11! Yes, I have long, wide feet. But, my new shoes are Skechers, and my old shoes are Skechers, and all 3 pair (I have indoor & outdoor Shape-Ups, yes, I'm that anal, I mean um, diligent, about my shoes) fit perfectly. How can 9.5W and 11 from the same company fit me the same? This is strange people, very strange! But I don't think I care that much, because I can now say I wear a size 9.5W which sounds much better than a size 11 in my mind :) Anyway, Remember I said I just ran on the treadmill before I started blogging today? I ran a full mile in 18:52, for a cost of 111 calories! Woo Hoo! I feel really great about that. I have figured out, if I walk the boys to school and back all 5 days that equals 4 miles a week for me (2 for them, since I walk back home instead of staying there for the whole school day ;) and then if I add a mile a day on the treadmill every day except Sunday, that is 10 miles a week. Once I work my way back up to 3 miles a day on the treadmill, that will be 22 miles a week! That is so cool because it's very easy for me, I'll probably do 1mi/day for the 1st week, 2 the 2nd and be up to 3mi/day on the treadmill by the beginning of the 3rd week! That's so soon! 3 miles was taking me, if I remember correctly, about 45 min a day. I'd like to get it down to at least 30, 20 would be so cool! Plus, since it's in my living room, no travel time :) YAY!
On a side note, I have decided not to go to the extreme of never having soda again. I will instead by very selective about allowing myself to have any, and very selective as to what kinds I will have. Example: yesterday I did my hubby a really big favor so...today he brought me a bottle of Sprecher's Orange Dream and I drank it slowly, let me tell you, it was so cold it was almost icy and it was SO tasty. And now that's fine, I can drink my water or Crystal Light Pure the rest of the day, the week, the month, whatever and be fine with that. I maybe will have a soda again when we go out for Chinese for Valentine's Day, but they serve my fave bottled iced tea there too, so I maybe won't.
Okay, the random babbling will stop now, as I have a home and family to go care for! May you have a blessed day, dear reader!
Jolene
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